What If…

What if depression didn’t have to be a secret?

What if we didn’t fear admitting anxiety?

What if telling others about our struggles was socially acceptable?

What if we could post “I’m having a terrible day. I want to hurt myself/my kids/my dog…whatever” on social media and our friends wouldn’t ignore the plea but would rush to help us, instead?

What if admitting post-partum depression wasn’t met with “you wanted kids.” As if by wanting kids we some how chose mental imballance too.

What if writing this blog didn’t feel like posting a naked selfie because it feels just as inappropriate?

What if spouses could vent to friends when they need support with a depressed loved one, without feeling judged?

What if we all admitted depression has touched us personally, or some one very close to us?

What if we admitted how scarey and lonely it feels?

What if we changed all this?

What if….?

New Things

My husband recently asked me to stop buying sweets, to help him loose a little weight. I just went to the grocery store, so there were sweets in the house already. I decided to put them away rather than eat them before I begin “not buying sweets.” Pop-tarts have been a breakfast staple around here for a while and they were the first to be stashed. Today I got busy making a slightly healthier alternative breakfast. Here’s what I did:

First, I put a small dot of butter in the bottom of each of cup in 2 12 count muffin tins. And placed the tins in a 350° oven, to melt the butter.

Use your imagination to insert picture here…

I have 3 kids. Taking pictures of every step did not happen.

Next, I scrambled some eggs. I really don’t know how many, because several were double yolked. I’m guessing it equaled about 9 or 10 eggs. I just scrambled the same way I normally do with a splash of milk, and seasoned with salt and pepper. By the time they were scrambled the butter was melted; this served to grease the muffin cups to keep the eggs from sticking. I then poured just a little (maybe 2-3 Tablespoons) of the scrambled eggs into each muffin cup and returned the pans to the oven.

Use your imagination again, it’s good for your brain.

While the eggs cooked, I started making biscuits. I used our family’s favorite recipe, that usually makes about 14 biscuits. But I rolled it out thinner so I could get 24, 2 inch biscuits. Of course, this meant they were thinner, but that worked out well in the end.

Imagine my model awful hands rolling out beautiful dough.

By the time the biscuits were ready to be baked the eggs were done. And while the biscuits cooked I was able to spoon out 24 perfect, little round scrambled egg disks.

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Tada! The kids were eating lunch and I took a picture of the eggs!

Ok, so now I have 24 egg disks, and 24 biscuits baking, the next ingredient is bacon. I admit to cheating this time. The only bacon in the house was a box of pre-cooked. That saved a step, and I just had to tear each piece in half. Cooking fresh bacon, or sausage patties would be another option. Adding cheese would be another option, but I want to skip those calories this time.

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Even better — by this step the kids were laying down for naps! Whoohoo!

Now this is the fun (easy) part. Just open each biscuit, put a egg disk, and a piece of bacon in there, put the top back on and presto — Breakfast Sandwich!

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Yum! Can’t say it has way fewer calories than a pop-tart, but at least it isn’t straight sugar.

And there you go, just continue making these little cuties until they are all made and looking scrumptious, then wrap them individually in plastic wrap, freeze them to make the biscuits hard, toss em all in a zip-lock baggie in the freezer; then just grab and reheat for breakfast. I planned on 2 biscuits as a breakfast, so I have 12 “servings” here.

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Yum, yummy.

These are also a great money saver, for us. We have chickens so the eggs were free, and home made biscuits are super cheap to make. Here’s hoping hubby likes them!

Writer’s Block

I’ve missed blogging the last few weeks but I have had major writer’s block. Nothing really comes to mind…at least nothing that really formulates into anything. So I guess I’ll just give an update on life as a mother of 3.

My little Laney will be 2 months old very soon! Some days that doesn’t seem possible, other days it seems like it has been much longer. She is starting to sleep better now; a huge relief after a very rough first month. She is growing, despite her odd eating habits. (She simply cannot decide if she wants to nurse or take a bottle.) And big brother and sister adore her.

Gracie and Skeet ave adjusted well. Skeet loves to say “hi Laney” over and over…and over. And he gives her kisses. Laney is the only family member to get kisses from Skeet. He blatantly refuses to kiss the rest of us. Gracie likes to be in charge of the swing and is always the one to restart it if Laney stops.

I’d say the biggest challenge by far is getting out of the house with 3 children under 4 years old. Today was a perfect example of that. We recently finished building a back yard fence (YAY!!!) and, as promised, the kids got a new puppy. Charlie pup needed her first trip to the vet today. There was no way for Brandon to get home in time to take her, or to keep the kids while I went; so off we went.

I should mention that Charlie was picked up a stray, when some one found her and her sister in a storm drain. Because of her questionable back ground and possible abuse she has been more skittish than most puppies. That being said we have been diligent to get her back outside quickly before she can make a mess in the house, thus avoiding having to exert heavy authority over her. Sooooo… she isn’t potty trained.

Gracie held little Charlie in her lap all the way to the vet. Then at the clinic we all unloaded, looking like the crazy train had just rolled into town, took her inside, and I constantly prayed not to have THAT pup that pees all over the floor. We had to wait for a bit, and Charlie did good.

When we got called back and finally saw the vet, I’m sure she wondered if I heard a word she said over me correcting and talking to kids, rocking a car seat, holding a puppy… and nodding and smiling. The good news is we managed to leave the vet’s office un-sprinkled and nobody had any serious melt downs. We even made it home with no accidents in the suburban, another huge fear of mine! I mean the Bus gets dirty, and smelly enough without puppy piddle!

In addition to my littles, and a puppy (because all smart moms bring home a puppy with a new baby in the house.) We are stepping up our efforts to remodel our house. The truth is, we don’t see ourselves living in the Texas Panhandle forever. We would very much like to move back to east Texas at some point; but our house needs a ton of work. Some things MUST be done or no bank will approve a loan, if we could even find some one willing to buy the problems. Other things really need work if we want to sell quickly. Plus, we’d kinda like to enjoy our house while we live here, instead of ALWAYS having projects over our heads. So we are attempting to knock some things off that big ol’ to-do list.

We always have brush to clear and burn. And we have tackled the basement now too. The work down there is pretty straight forward, it just takes time and focus — two things that are very hard to come by in our crazy life. At any rate we are hoping to be able to actually use our basement before long, with out feeling like we are in a dungeon some where.

So, that’s pretty much life right now. And this blog is about as organized and focused as I get too, so don’t look for any great literary masterpieces in the near future!